Posts tagged holidays
I’m not usually one for holiday traditions. I don’t put up a Christmas tree or decorate my home for Christmas and I often don’t participate in gift or card exchanges. I don’t eat black-eyed peas on New Year’s Day. I don’t celebrate Easter. I rarely celebrate Valentine’s day, Memorial Day, or Labor Day.The only holidays I typically celebrate are Independence Day, Halloween, Thanksgiving, and New Year’s Eve.
I don’t really have anything against holidays or traditions, I’m just indifferent to them. Major religious holidays like Christmas and Easter don’t suit me because I’m not a Christian. However, most of my family members are Christian so I will try to get together with them on Christmas and or Christmas Eve.
Moving out alone prompted other changes and I view it as a fresh start. I spent Christmas Eve with my mom and grandparents, despite drama Shawna and/or David tried to stir up. After work on Christmas Day I went back out to my grandparents’ house and celebrated with them. I ate black-eyed peas on New Year’s Day for the first time in at least five years, probably closer to ten. I want to keep the momentum going, so I’ll make some resolutions for the upcoming year albeit a few days late.
I went to Grandma’s house for Thanksgiving, as usual. This year, I was smart and prepared the desserts I was taking the two days earlier, so Thanksgiving morning I wasn’t running around like a chicken with my head cut off trying to get everything ready in time. I made chocolate banana cream pie, fruit cocktail cake, coconut cream pie, strawberry banana pie, and banana split pie. I’m the dessert queen of the family.
I’ve always been good at making desserts, spaghetti, and other common things like hamburgers, but I’ve cooked a lot since I’ve been too broke to eat out the past few months. I’m becoming adept at cooking dinner. I’m still not acclimated to cooking for just one person so I often have leftovers, but that’s okay, I just take them to work the next day. I usually have company on weekends, so I don’t cook for just one all the time.
Independence day… What is there to say about that? Plenty. I’m not in much of a mood to celebrate “Independence Day” because I don’t feel like we have the amount of freedom our forefathers intended.
Being an American sure isn’t what it used to be. Honestly, I’d much rather be Canadian because: I loathe George W. Bush and his whole political family; I can’t stand the big greedy corporations; our justice system is a complete joke; and the American government is taking more and more of our freedom and civil liberties away by adding this stipulation or that amendment and they are more concerned with making other countries convert to democracy than the decline of our own democracy.
This New Year’s Eve started out great, but didn’t stay that way. Nothing terrible happened; the evening was a lot of fun until about an hour after the New Year.
Jess had called me around 9:30 and wanted to know what my plans were. I told her I was going to the bar with Joe and Tori. She said she was going to stay home. She is only nineteen and I didn’t want her sitting home bored on New Year’s Eve so I invited her along with us.
Back in the day I worked at the bar we planned to go to and Tori is still employed there. We knew the owner wouldn’t have a problem with Jess coming with us, despite her age. She’ll be twenty on January 7.
My sister and I haven’t been close since she met McKayla’s father. I didn’t like him from the get go and I made it well known. She chose him and I had to live with that. I tolerated him as necessary, but I never grew to like him. She finally wised up to his philandering ways and ended their relationship a few days before McKayla’s first birthday.
I love McKayla like she was my own daughter. In fact, thoughts of abandoning her stopped me from committing suicide the last time I was hell bent on dying by my own hand. She is the reason I checked myself into the hospital last January.
I have wanted to rekindle the relationship with Jess and I figured hanging out with her was a step in the right direction. I was wrong, or at least that is how I felt that night.
Whew! That was a lot of shit!
Self-injury session went too far and I had to get 27 stitches (New Year’s Day)
I stopped self-injuring for 6 months and then had several relapses
I had a breakdown at work.
I checked myself into a psychiatric hospital due to suicidal urges
I began the long journey to recovery
I started this blog
Tori almost died by suicide
I allowed myself to start crying
I cried four times
My brother left the Aryan Brotherhood
My mom lost her job and I had to support her
My mom’s car was stolen on my birthday
Some of my special belongings were ruined on my birthday due to a roof leak
Erick and I forgave each other face to face so to speak
Erick and I became online friends with benefits
Erick got divorced
Nick and I reconciled
Nick and I broke up
Nick went to prison
Jonathan stalked me
A friend was diagnosed with a terminal illness and was given less than a year to live
The ice storm from hell almost destroyed my house and hometown
My brother got to meet our niece for the first time
I had more episodes than I can remember
I had to take off work for several months due to the episodes
I filed a complaint against Directv for discrimination
I won the right to sue Directv from the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission
I added 11 notches to my bedpost and revisited sexcapades with several former lovers
Tyler and his girlfriend was ran over twice and killed
My uncle was almost sent to prison
I became a member of a private sex club
I had my first foursome
J.R got married
J.R got an annulment
Dena let her kids meet their half-brother/2nd cousin
Dena forgave her cousin for getting pregnant by her husband
Jess went wild after leaving Gerald
Tori started having threesomes
Carah had 2 miscarriages
Carah is pregnant again
McKayla started walking, cutting teeth, and talking
McKayla had her first birthday
Jess got busted by the police having sex in her car
Joe got out of rehab
Ally almost died from a drug overdose
Felicia was diagnosed as bipolar
I learned a lot about myself and began addressing major issues from my life
I almost allowed myself to fall in love again
I was off work for several months due to hospitalization and a ton of therapy and groups