Posts tagged Greg
Yesterday, I was off work again. Tori and I spent a large part of the day goofing off and talking. We played more games, toked, and listened to music. We are both financially challenged right now so we didn’t have many other options.
My mom has some dude crashing at my house with her. He seems nice enough, but it’s highly irritating that she let him start staying there without asking for permission from either me or Dudney. Her bf called so I took the phone back to her room. The door was halfway open, so I pushed it open more and seen what I never ever wanted to see again… my mother having sex. That was just wrong, and I am scarred. I can’t get the mental picture of my mom’s jiggling boobs out of my head. It’s quite disturbing. I talked Greg about it and although he empathized with me he couldn’t stop laughing his ass off. Tori thought it was hilarious as well.
Nick’s cousin, Adam, has a crush on me. I’ve let him and Adam hang out at my house several times the past couple months or so. Adam’s dad owns the machine shop I worked at last August. I met Adam prior to that when Nick and I were dating.
I became somewhat close to Adam’s sister, Amanda, while I was working at the shop. She and Adam had constantly reassured me that they wouldn’t allow Nick to get me fired when the whole Tamara-Nick fiasco was going on last summer.
Nick has told me before that Adam usually likes skinny chicks, but he is attracted to me. I’m not usually one that seeks to convert men to wanting BBWs, unless I’m truly interested in someone that usually dates skinny or thin women.
From my experience, once a man is with a BBW he doesn’t revert back to his previous preferences. I’ve been told by men I “converted” that they like the attention BBWs give them, we typically appreciate them more than our skinny counterparts, we are great in bed, we aren’t superficial, we let them be themselves, and we tend to be better cooks.
Whenever Shawna’s face enters my mind I cringe because I want to choke the shit out of her. I don’t literally want to kill her, but I am still angry with her for manipulating my brother into marrying her. I am still enraged with her because their “happy” family is based on a big fat lie and the longer it takes for the truth to come out my baby brother is going to be even more heartbroken and devastated.
For the past eight months or so, Shawna has been in limbo between those two lists. At several points of our twelve year friendship I loved her like a sister. I was mad as hell at her for stabbing me in the back a few times during that same timeframe. However, I always forgave her misdeeds because she would be there for me when I really needed her. It’s different this time. How do I forgive her for what she did to my brother and our family while she is still doing it?
- my ex-stepfather [↩]
- one of my mom’s exes who molested me [↩]
- the ex-step uncle that raped me [↩]
- my sister, Tara’s mother – who kept us apart for years, then Tara died [↩]
- ex-best friend who betrayed me [↩]
- Zane’s future ex-wife [↩]
- Greg’s baby momma [↩]
- bitch sisters that jumped me on my 17th birthday [↩]
- a neighbor that molested and tried to kidnap me [↩]
- my father [↩]
I was listening to the radio on my way home from work last night and “My Sacrifice” came on. It has been me and Erick’s song for about seven years. Several months ago, he sent me a video clip of him in his car with that song playing on the radio. He was surprised they still play it. I figured I would send him a text message to see how he’s doing since we’re still friends. I told him about the song and he said they still play it there too and it always makes him think about me.
We texted each other for about three hours, during which we talked about several things, including sex (big surprise, right?). I had good intentions, but we ended up reminiscing about our past together. Among other things, he told me I’m more sexually compatible with him that anyone else he’s ever been with and he’d have sex with me anytime, regardless of who he’s dating. We ended up sexting (another big surprise, right?).
I’ve still been dating Greg a few times a month, but not having sex with him. I’ve also started getting closer to a couple more guys I’ve met recently. One was through some friends and the other one works with me. Things are still on the flirting level with the two new guys. Greg and I are in the comfort zone, and I’m not quite sure where things stand with Zane.
Things with Zane have cooled off a bit. We haven’t seen each other or spoken much the past two weeks because we have completely opposite schedules now. He’s only off on Tuesdays and the rest of the week he works 7pm – 4am. I’m off Friday and Saturdays, but work 10:45am-7:30ish the rest of the week. When he’s off I’m at work or sleeping and when I’m off he’s at work or sleeping.
Zane also has a lot of challenges to deal with right now: this whole pre-divorce thing, trying to get back on his feet financially due to being out of work for almost three months, and a moderately severe depressive episode. Apparently, he’s bipolar type 2. He was diagnosed after we lost touch before, I just found out a few weeks ago.