'we all go a little mad sometimes'
Posts tagged David
Big Sis, Lil Momma
1 year ago
I began adulthood when I was five years old. It was gradual that first year, but after my mother got pregnant by my then step-father the learning curve grew steeper with each passing month. By my mother’s sixth month of pregnancy I learned Larry was an alcoholic pervert. By her seventh month, I had learned how to play opossum while being sexually assaulted. By her eighth month, I learned it was my duty to assume the responsibilities she ignored or forgot. By her ninth month, I learned how to take care of a baby because neither Larry nor my mother could be trusted to handle it. I fell in love with David the first time I saw him and I took my role as big sister very seriously. I knew I would protect him at all costs.
The day my mother and brand new baby brother were released from the hospital I learned Larry was also physically abusive and how to rescue them from him. I learned by sheer guy instinct. Larry was drunk and started arguing with my mother. She said something and he threw her up against the dryer and started slapping and punching her. He broke her glasses for the first time. I was screaming at him, trying to distract him and get him to leave her alone. The baby was crying. Mom took off outside to get away from Larry. I ran to David and picked him up; trying to soothe him and stop his crying. I was scared shitless that Larry was going to hurt him if I couldn’t settle him down.
Another Good Day in 2012
1 year ago
I spent some time with my mom and grandparents earlier. I had made roast and vegetables for dinner. It turned out pretty damn good. It wasn’t perfect, but it was only the second time I’ve made a roast. Granny had also gone to the doctor yesterday and got good news. Her defibulator/pacemaker is finally helping. The last adjustment they made worked and the doctor is taking her off some of her medications. Hearing that was a big relief. With all the loss the second half of 2011 brought, it is wonderful to have some great news for a change. Granny’s health is important to me. I couldn’t handle losing her or Pawpa.
Shawna is Harassing Me Again
1 year ago
in Events, Relationships
David and/or Shawna tried to ruin my Christmas Eve. However, it didn’t work. All he/she accomplished was getting Granny pissed off. I think it’s pathetic that he/she/they would wait until Christmas Eve to try to stir up drama, but that’s Shawna’s style. She tries to emotionally hurt people as badly as she can. Her tactics don’t work on me anymore. I’d have to give a shit about what they thought for that to happen and quite honestly, I couldn’t give a fuck less.
The only reason I am writing this is because Granny asked me to do so. She said, “I want you and Jess to tell that spiteful bitch that I SAID THIS SHIT BETTER FUCKING STOP! This is bullshit! Our family didn’t have any fights or trouble like this until that BITCH-WITCH came along. She needs to grow up and stop bothering you. So does David Leslie if he’s involved in this crap too. IT’S BULLSHIT!” Anyone who knows my Granny knows she can’t stand the ‘F’ word. She only uses it when she really means it. I’m posting Granny’s warning because I know Shawna still obsessively stalks me via my blog and social networking sites despite the protective order, so this is the best means to get it to her without actually having to interact with the evil cunt and violate my own protective order.
Granny, Mom, Jess, and Taylor all read the messages. Mom is convinced it was all Shawna, pretending to be David and doesn’t even think David knows about it. Granny and Taylor think Shawna did it all, but that David knew about it. Jess and I think David and Shawna both were doing it. I want to think what my mom thinks, but I don’t. None of us think it was David acting alone. Shawna was definitely involved in the harassment, which is a direct violation of the protective order.
For those of you who aren’t Shawna, David, or know either of them you’re probably a bit curious about what this is all about. If you’ve been reading my blog for a couple of years or if you’ve read old posts then you have an idea of what’s going on. For those that don’t, I’ll explain.
2012 Resolutions & Goals
I’m not usually one for holiday traditions. I don’t put up a Christmas tree or decorate my home for Christmas and I often don’t participate in gift or card exchanges. I don’t eat black-eyed peas on New Year’s Day. I don’t celebrate Easter. I rarely celebrate Valentine’s day, Memorial Day, or Labor Day.The only holidays I typically celebrate are Independence Day, Halloween, Thanksgiving, and New Year’s Eve.
I don’t really have anything against holidays or traditions, I’m just indifferent to them. Major religious holidays like Christmas and Easter don’t suit me because I’m not a Christian. However, most of my family members are Christian so I will try to get together with them on Christmas and or Christmas Eve.
Moving out alone prompted other changes and I view it as a fresh start. I spent Christmas Eve with my mom and grandparents, despite drama Shawna and/or David tried to stir up. After work on Christmas Day I went back out to my grandparents’ house and celebrated with them. I ate black-eyed peas on New Year’s Day for the first time in at least five years, probably closer to ten. I want to keep the momentum going, so I’ll make some resolutions for the upcoming year albeit a few days late.
Where Have I Been?
2 years ago
It’s been awhile since I checked in with my personal blog because I’ve been devoted to creating and updating a webzine for bipolars. I don’t want my blog associated with it because I have learned (thanks to Shawna the Super Cunt) that people will use anything they can against you and your loved ones when they feel so inclined and want to hurt you. I didn’t want all the drama to carry over to my webzine so I have been stealth around here. I also did not want the two associated because I have been painfully honest about people and events in my life and I want to keep it secret to an extent.
I have missed the catharsis usually accomplished by pouring out my feelings and getting shit out in the open through my writing. I struggled with the decision whether to make “Reflections of a Crazy Life” a private or subscription only blog to prevent it from causing more pain and turmoil in my real life. I chose against privatizing it because that would have violated my purpose for creating it in the first place. Besides, the worst has come to light and I’m still here to tell about it… “Sometimes you gotta say, ‘What the fuck!’”
I miss mania and hypomania […]