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Tamara’s Marriage

This entry was posted on Tuesday, July 15th, 2008 at 9:44 am

Around 1:30 this morning I was drinking and hanging out with . I signed into yahoo messenger and her husband messaged me. He was saying things like “I just want you to know i still wish you would have shown up by yourself.” I told him that it didn’t matter; he got laid out of the deal. He said, “yeah, but not by you.” He had thought I wouldn’t be able to resist his advances. Egos like that is a huge turn off.

I am not the slightest bit interested in her husband. Even if I was, I wouldn’t pursue anything with him for the simple fact that it would be wrong. I have never cheated and I have never violated the friendship code. I’m sure as hell not about to start now. I wouldn’t even do it when we were fighting for those six weeks, despite his continued request to meet with me.

He is probably doing it to hurt her anyway and I’m not going to let him use me. Fuck that. I’ve been used enough in my life. I’ve tried to set the boundary of staying out of it, but refuses to let me. I hate that they are dragging me into their marital problems.

was sitting next to me throughout the whole conversation. I didn’t want to talk to him because I knew it would hurt her, but she begged me. She has the right to know that her husband is trying to hook up with me.

is only twenty years old. She married Kevin when she was nineteen. He’s in the army so a large part of their first year of marriage was spent away from each other. He cheated several times and she always forgave him. After cheating he would project his behavior onto her because his guilty conscience.

He seen and had to do things in Iraq that fucked him up. He is still supposed to be there, but he is in the process of getting a medical discharge because he tried to kill himself. He couldn’t handle what he had to do to save his life and that of several of his fellow soldiers on top of all the problems in his marriage.

Kevin and I talked quite a bit when and I were fighting. He explained a lot of how he felt to me and I was trying to convey that to . I see both sides of the story and I try to explain the others’ point of view to each of them. She can’t seem to understand that the way she is trying to latch on to him to keep him from drifting away is causing him to pull away from her.

After Kevin got offline and I talked about everything for about two hours. I see so much of myself in her it hurts. I totally empathize with her.
I think after our long conversation this morning that is starting to get it. I hope so; otherwise, she is going to push her husband right into divorce court.

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On this day..

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