Instant gratification isn’t possible when it comes to recovery. I need to keep reminding myself that recovery takes time; whether it is recovery from physical illness, surgery, addiction or mental illness. It takes time to regain, reclaim, and recoup all that was lost while I tried to cope with the , addictions, and mental illness on my own.

I cannot flip a switch, snap my fingers, or wave a magic wand and make all that I’ve been through disappear. Dwelling on the past does not change it. The only thing I can do is stop repeating it in the present.

I have to find a way to stop letting old wounds keep me from living. I have to open myself up to life or I will never find happiness or emotional stability.

Building , healing old wounds, and change all take time. There are no immediate, ready-made solutions. I need to get that through my head. Once I do, I can stop chastising myself so much for making mistakes and finally heal.

On this day..