This morning, I had to get up and take Tori to work at the bar like I usually do on Sundays. I hang out with her there for a few hours or until the end of her shift - depending on who all is up there and how much fun I’m having.

We were sitting at our table in the back playing cards (BTW, I was winning LOL), when Tori said, “Holy shit, isn’t it a small world.” Oh man, did I really want to turn around and see who it was? You never know who is going to suddenly pop back into your life. Instead of turning around, I asked her who it was and she said it was Johnnie (Jonathon).

Damn, talk about a blast from the past. I was almost scared to turn around. I didn’t have to, he walked straight back to our table and sat down like a single day hadn’t passed. He is about 6?2 and is very muscular. He definitely has a hot body. I had forgotten how hot he was.

I hadn’t been feeling very sexual since the diagnosis. Sex was the last thing on my mind actually. I felt defective and didn’t want to be touched.

Saturday night, I was getting drunk and stoned off my ass (isn’t escapism grand?). Derek called and wanted to come over. I let him, but told him I wasn’t in the mood for sex. He said that was okay. So anyways, we talked and smoked a bowl.

He told me that he wanted to see me because he was moving to Los Angeles soon. The movie he was working on (”Isolation”) was purchased and they wanted him to come out and start working on some other projects. I’m happy for him. His dreams are coming true.

I didn’t want to be a downer, but he could tell that something was wrong with me. I think he had expected me to be upset because he was moving. I finally told him about the diagnosis and he tried to comfort me for awhile, I thought it was really sweet.

I have gotten over the shock and anger from the doctor’s news and now I’m moving into the acceptance stage. I didn’t go to work the last three days. I was just too emotional. I couldn’t take the stress of being around 100s of coworkers and helping stupid people figure out how to use their directv equipment, (you’d be surprised how many people call me because they have no volume - turn mute off, dummy; snowy screen - change to the correct channel output; black screen - turn the tv on, dipshit; etc.) Tori has been here with me since the diagnosis.

Tori is awesome. She is always there for me. Once again her and Dudney are helping me through shitty times. I wonder where I’d be without them… well, actually, I probably don’t really want to know.

Anyways, we’re getting fucked up tonight… yep yep, we’re getting fucked up.

Dudney and I went to Dischorus ‘06 in Oklahoma City yesterday. It was an all day music festival at the zoo amphitheater, which is the best venue I’ve ever been to. It was huge and there was stadium type seating and lots of shade (unlike most music festivals I’ve been to.)

There were lots of good bands there: Seether, Shinedown, Crossfade, Breaking Benjamin, Buck Cherry, Hailstorm, Rikets and 4-5 other bands

We saw a shitload of hotties there. (I’m bi, so there was double the eye candy for me.)

All the bands were good (except the first two.) Their music wasn’t bad per se, but the fuckers were talking smack about two of my favorite bands.

Jealousy is a bad thing, boys and girls.

In a previous entry I talked about running into Doug at a birthday party recently. He’s my roomie’s brother. I had avoided him for the past seven or eight years. He was a one night stand that I had blocked from my memory. He was horrible in bed. I wasn’t really broken in when we hooked up and it hurt like hell. He didn’t understand the concept of being gentle.

Four or five years before we had sex I had a big crush on him. I was fourteen and he was seventeen. He was the first guy I jerked off - well, it was the first time that it wasn’t against my will.

Anyways, I avoided him as much as possible at that birthday party. I had forgotten about him afterwards and didn’t expect to see him again any time soon.

Saturday, my roomie decided to have a little get-together at our apartment and I’ll be damned if Doug didn’t show up.

I have an unconventional pet. His name is Osiris and he is a beautiful ball python. I call him Osiris - after the Egyptian God of Death and Rebirth/Resurrection. I’ve had him since the end of February 2006.

Due to the Christian conditioning of my childhood I was terrified of snakes. I thought they were the embodiment of pure evil.

I faced my fear a few years ago at the Tulsa State Fair. There was this huge sixteen foot Burmese python that was taking pictures with people. Her name is Harriet and I decided to take a picture with her.

I sat in the chair while this guy wrapped this enormous snake around my body. At first I was panic-stricken and I worried that I would have an anxiety attack. It took the guy about ten minutes to get Harriet situated around me. I was amazed at how tame she was. I took the picture and afterwards I noticed that my fear of snakes had dwindled a bit.

I just had some fun.
You know those annoying-ass, door-knocking, proselytizing, holier-than-thou assholes that go around trying to “save your soul from eternal damnation and the depths of hell”, well, I just scared the hell (no pun intended) out of a few of them.